About that Not Cleaning Thing….and the Difference between Men & Women

I’ve mentioned before that I don’t clean. That’s not entirely true. Only my version of “cleaning” is really what normal people would call straightening or picking up. I’m great at that.

Think about it. My self-diagnosed ADD does not permit me to do any one thing for longer than 10 seconds or so. My version of cleaning allows me to move constantly and get instant gratification (that’s clearly a biggie with me). Dishes on the counter to dishes in the dishwasher, instant clean countertop.

I despise things that take a long time. I like to get it done, as quickly as possible, without analyzing it and move onto other things. I’m fairly certain that it’s a disorder but it works for me. I’m sure that I should stop to smell the roses or something equally corny and cliche-ish,  but I like me the way I am.

Now the husband is exactly the opposite. He takes a long time and carefully determines the most logical way to do something and usually does it slowly. It’s also usually correct. But that’s not the point. He is patient and calculating, I am impatient and rush wildly headlong into whatever I am facing. We both usually end up with the correct result, but I tend to arrive there faster.

Housecleaning is no exception. When I really clean, I will methodically do it room by room finishing up by running the vacuum cleaner. I do the whole house stopping only to empty the bucket. I don’t vacuum much because it’s the arrangement we worked out a long time ago. He does the floors. He takes a long time to do those floors.

We do not have a big house. 1700 sq feet on the main level and only about 3/4 of that is carpet. So why the snail pace? He likes to do a very thorough job. But. The same result happens when I vacuum in half the time it takes him…..clean carpets.

Men just do things different. That should come as no real shock to anyone who has progressed past that honeymoon stage of 5 minutes years. I’m sure he finds it relaxing and calming. I find it a chore to be finished with. I suppose that if we were the same, doing things the same way life would be boring and uninteresting.

His motto is “No big rush” while mine is “are we there yet”.

But who am I to complain. I have a husband who vacuums, can do his own laundry and mostly doesn’t complain about my lack of enthusiasm for housekeeping in general. As long as he can get to the stove to make his daily breakfast, he’s a happy camper.

And other than a few snarky quips every now and again about moving our dressers into the laundry room, he’s mastered the art of checking the bathroom closet for a towel before getting in the shower because he knows that he’s more likely to find a towel and his clothes neatly folded, waiting in the laundry room for a gnome to put them away.

Once in a while, every so often, I’ll put everything away just to keep him on his toes. Usually after he has stopped looking in the closets and just goes straight to the laundry room.

It wouldn’t be nice if I let him get too complacent….I’m self-employed with a three-hour workday and a short attention span, I’ll take my fun where I can get it.


  1. As Jackie Gleason used to say, “Your a riot Alice (Maria)”


  2. That is a great picture of you. love, G


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